Two Christmases...

As much as I love Christmas, sometimes I feel like this:

Now, granted... I am not married, but two Christmases is enough to juggle. I miss the good ole days when my brother and I would wake up ridiculously early. We were all in one house.

I really miss my grandma around the holidays. She died over 10 years ago and holidays just have never been the same without her.

Now  I am living on my own, waking up on Christmas alone. I do love Christmas and all, but that does not mean I am not lonely during the holidays.

I went to lunch last week with our staff and had a hard time coming up with a Christmas tradition. All of our old ones no longer exist due to the fact that we're not in the same house anymore. Being an adult child of divorce can really suck sometimes, but here's to blazing a trail of new traditions... and maybe going on a Christmas cruise someday to just relax during the holiday season!

Advent week 2: HOPE

Continuing my journey and writing down thoughts has been really great for me.

 

 

 

 

I just found this video via Marko. Precious children sharing the BEST STORY EVER:

Advent Week 1: FAITH

Having grown up in a church that never really did much with the church calendar, I'm making my own version of Advent.

My roommate goes to a traditional church and brought home an Advent daily Bible reading schedule.

A few weeks ago I went into a thrift store with a friend. I noticed an advent wreath complete with candles for $4. I did not have money on me, so later that day I snatched it up. They had been redecorating, so I was afraid they had sold it. I asked an employee if they knew where it was, and she directed me straight to it. YEA!

I know that each week has a word attached to it. I thought week 1 was faith (it's HOPE, but it's in the Bible as faith, hope, and love, so why wouldn't it be first?!).

I do my Bible reading in the morning and light my advent candles during dinner.

I am enjoying the lessons God is teaching me in this time of re-focusing on who Jesus is. He was BORN a KING. Man, I love my Jesus.



Children Champs



George Barna wrote this book that I should have read in college. Luckily, I got to see him last Wednesday speak about it. It makes me want to actually read the entire thing because it is about a subject dear to my heart: children.

He became a Christian in his 20's, so he never experienced children's ministry. From his research, he learned that Ministry to children is the single most influential/life changing ministry you can engage in!

A lot of beliefs and habits are set in place by the time a person reaches the age of THIRTEEN!

Never give up on kids! Our development in Christ is a lifelong process.

Barna talked to the senior ministers who were attending. He stated:Why is ministry to adults difficult? We didn't take them seriously when they were young.

Barna said exactly what my favorite quote says (and I just realized that HE was the one who said it!): If you want to have a lasting influence on the world, you must invest in people's lives; and if you want to maximize that investment, then you must invest in those people while they are young.

Fear and Hope

I promised the second part of my campference update... so here it is!

I have only been in paid ministry since 2008 (seems like a long time... and yet only a brief moment at other times) and it was so good to hear someone address fears. Tic Long has 30+ years of experience in ministry. I have heard about him through his work at YS, but it was truly a pleasure hearing his heart.

Fear of the world as it is today (culture)
Kids are looking for authentic adults who truly care about them.

Fear of failing
All of us who appear to have it together have a trail of disasters behind us. We just don't talk about it.

Fear that you are not good enough.
If I were God, I wouldn't use me. No freaking way.
Peter -- patron saint of youth workers. haha...
It's a lie from Satan if you feel like you're disqualified because of your past. Your past pain will be a bridge to another student's healing.
Youth ministry is more about serving than skills; listening than talking; caring instead of charisma; being there instead of being cool.
God has shaped your heart for middle school kids.

Fear that God is disappointed in you
He's not.
Tic told a story about going to visit Henri Nouwen at L'Arche. He learned that Even if you couldn't DO anything for God, God loves you.
Everything we do in ministry has no effect on God's love for us. As ministers, it is easy to go from thinking of yourself as God's child to employee.

As you can probably tell, the fear of not being good enough connected with me the most.

Marko talked about HOPE, a topic I have wanted to do a word study on for a couple of years now.

Hope is a gift that comes to us in our struggling.
Healthy Discontentment is a prerequisite for hope.
Hope patterns: exile --> dissatisfaction --> honesty --> FEAR (what if God doesn't show up?) --> Longing & Hope

Don't worry, be happy is seriously crappy theology.
Our hope is found in Jesus.

We ended the time by singing On Christ the Solid Rock I Stand. That song got me through the toughest summer of my life and is a good reminder of who to put our HOPE in.

One of the best blessings from this weekend was meeting Melissa. She is a middle school minister and was a constant source of encouragement. Truly loved getting to know her... already looking forward to next year! October 11-13, 2013... MARK IT ON YOUR CALENDARS NOW!

MS Campference

Spring Hill in Seymour, IN was the perfect setting for the last weekend of October. A place to reflect on life and enjoy the beauty of God's creation: both in nature and in people.

Thank God I had my GPS though because I got there an hour after it started (due to asthma crap before I started on my roadtrip) and would not have been able to find it in the dark with those winding hillside roads. Makes me miss living in KY a little bit.

I was challenged in a lot of ways... from mealtime conversations with a group of girls who came by themselves (like me) to the main session speakers to the breakout groups. Every person I met had their own story about ministry challenges and successes. I even reconnected with a couple guys that went to KCU with me. I never expect to see people from college being so far north...

As an introvert, I appreciated the more intimate setting. There were 100 people, so it really did feel like a weekend retreat at a camp with new friends. The youth ministry veterans did not make us feel inferior but rather ate meals with us and were genuinely interested in our experiences in ministry. It was unlike any other conference I have ever been to. I loved it. Josh Griffin sums up well what happens at youth ministry conferences and Marko hits on what made MSMC special. For me, it was a time of reflecting, refreshing, healing, and just resting. It was much needed after this summer's crazy schedule.

Highlights:
*Mark Dowds: Bitterness will be like a cancer. You will become the opposite of what you are today if you do not take care of it today. It will rob you from the life/ministry God wants you to have.

*Meeting Brooklyn Lindsey and Katie Edwards. Yea women in ministry! Both have written (or helped to write) books.

From the Rants:
*Brooklyn Lindsey: Crocs aren't from God.

*Brooklyn Lindsey: You rob us of a part of God's image if you are not yourself. God needs your uniqueness to minister to students.

*Adam McLane: Repent of desire to build ministries based on staff/facilities... It needs the Holy Spirit. He talked about decentralizing student ministers' roles...

*Scott Rubin: Not having someone who knows my secret world could wreck my ministry by next year. Sadly, I've seen this happen to a friend in ministry... Check out Scott's post on this topic. 

Since this is becoming a novel, part 2 will be Tic and Marko's messages...

STYX

This morning as I was listening to STYX on my ipod, I realized I never shared the awesomeness of my time with Laura around Piqua and at the STYX concert. On Laura's birthday, we went out to eat to one of the best Mexican restaurants ever: La Fiesta!

I had some good laughs...

Saturday night fun... Too bad I don't live closer; otherwise I would be there for Chicago too!

We bought glow STYX and listened to a guy blare (and sing along to) Nickelback. 

Kind of a psycho picture below, but we attempted several more pics and the STYX background wouldn't show up! Super great concert, though!

STYX got me through my post-college time of unemployment/living with my parents. Super great music and I want to see them again ASAP! 

Here's a song I listened to on the way to vote at the library.

Man in the Wilderness::STYX

Side note: while you may think this post about STYX has nothing to do with making Christ known, I truly believe God gave these musicians incredible talent. They could sing the same high notes they did back in the day... they would give any band these days a run for their money in actual musical talent. 

Middle School Campference

This past weekend I went down to Spring Hill Camp in Seymour, IN. I arrived at the campference an hour after it started. It threw me off for the entire night, but the trip down was not without its blessings from God, such as the beautiful sunset. 

Surprisingly enough, I did not take any pictures of my new friends... only the beautiful scenery of southern Indiana. Let me share some scenes that helped spur on deeper thoughts about life and my love of middle school students: 

 On the way home, I passed a HUGE field of orange -- pumpkins!

 A Sandy-inspired sunset.

I will share some insights later about what I learned this past weekend. Just wanted to share some beautiful pictures from October 2012. 

Birthdays & Jesus

So my 28th birthday was on Tuesday.

Anyone who knows me well, knows that I am more of a small dinner party rather than a surprise and/or large birthday bash kind of gal.

That's why I went to dinner with my roommate and my mom. It did not help that I was sick and could barely enjoy the taste of the amazing pizza we had.

My roommate, Krysten, knows me well... She bought me five different colored earbuds (because I have the worst luck with them) and a three movie collection of Doris Day and Rock Hudson movies. 

Anyway, I was thinking about birthdays. I want to know that I am important in people's lives all year, not just on the day that is "all about me". My roommate's presents to me meant a lot because of her PRESENCE with me throughout the year. My top love language is quality time. I LOVE SPENDING TIME WITH PEOPLE!

But then there are people who think that just because they go to a Christmas service that they KNOW Christ... it's truly about spending time to get to know Who Jesus is. It's a relationship.

I love Christmas because it celebrates my JESUS... and there is nothing better than celebrating the life and legacy of a great Friend.

Where Words Fail, Pictures and Music Speak

a tree grows in piqua...

square one... it took a long time to get back here...

Autumn at its best...

Survivor... this summer was brutal, but through it all this was the survivor. 

Fit = Fail

Ok, so that last post is a joke.

Not really, but I think I only made it through week one.

My 28th birthday was yesterday.
I would like to improve my spiritual and physical health by digging into the Word more this year and also trying to exercise regularly. What is it about summer that makes me GAIN weight? Isn't summer supposed to be the time when people look their best? For me, it's winter. I think it is because the summer has such great food and temptations (like ice cold drinks and ice cream), that I gain pounds in the summer.

Anyway, here's to 28 being the healthiest, best year of my life.

The best is yet to come!

Get Fit in Fall 2012

It's no secret that this year has been rough on me. I am not even sure why because it's not like I have anything particularly BAD happening in my life. I am just discontent... and not spending consistent time on things that matter.

My friend sent me this five week challenge of getting into shape in all areas of life. I like this goal because it has a set time frame and seems doable.

http://peak313.com/featured/our-5-week-fall-challenge-living-and-active/

It started yesterday, but there is still time to join in if you want to. In the five weeks I will be on vacation at some point during three of those weeks, so we'll see how this goes.

Martha, Martha, Martha

Luke 10.39-42 (NKJV): And she had a sister called Mary, who also sat at Jesus’ feet and heard His word. But Martha was distracted with much serving, and she approached Him and said, “Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Therefore tell her to help me.” And Jesus answered and said to her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things. But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her.” Emphasis mine.

This is one of the passages Sarah Young put into today's Jesus Calling devo.

Mary is sitting at Jesus' feet, quietly soaking in His presence and choosing the best thing. Martha is all flustered and bent out of shape because her sister is not helping out with all the details.

As this school year is beginning, student ministry is off and running... I feel way behind because my boss has been out of town a lot this summer, and honestly I don't feel like I've had much of a summer. It hasn't been relaxing... I am going on vacation next Wednesday to visit my mom's family and hope that is a time to refresh and refocus.

This summer has also been the lowest point of my spiritual life to date, I believe. It's not that things are horrible, but I am just drained in more ways than one. So as you go about your day if you think of me, please say a prayer. Encourage your ministers as they pour into people and remind them that spending quality time with Jesus IS what matters most.

It's always easy for me to relate to the "good" people of the Bible, but sometimes I get a slap on the hand and hear Jesus quietly say, "Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things...."

Jesus Calling::August 31

Jesus Calling by Sarah Young.

August 31: Grow strong in your weakness. Some of My children I've gifted with abundant strength and stamina. Others, like you, have received the humble gift of frailty. Your fragility is not a punishment, nor does it indicate lack of faith. On the contrary, weak ones like you must live by faith, depending on Me to get you through the day. I am developing your ability to trust Me, to lean on Me, rather than on your understanding. Your natural preference is to tplan out your day, knowing what will happen when. My preference is for you to depend on my continually, trusting Me to guide you and strength you as needed. This is how you grow strong in your weakness.

James 4.13-15: Look here, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we are going to a certain town and will stay there a year. We will do business there and make a profit.” How do you know what your life will be like tomorrow? Your life is like the morning fog—it’s here a little while, then it’s gone. What you ought to say is, “If the Lord wants us to, we will live and do this or that.”

Proverbs 3.5 (AMP): Lean on, trust in, and be confident in the Lord with all your heart and mind and do not rely on your own insight or understanding.

Isaiah 40.28-31: Have you never heard? Have you never understood? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of all the earth. He never grows weak or weary. No one can measure the depths of his understanding. He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. Even youths will become weak and tired, and young men will fall in exhaustion. But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.

Camp 2012

I went to WyldLife camp for the first time ever. It was the same week as my high school week of camp that I usually go to, but it was great to have a new experience with awesome people!

We went banana boating:

 8th grade girls:

 These are three of the girls in my cabin. Absolutely LOVE them... and this picture pretty much describes each of us perfectly.

 The boys:

 Group picture:

One month

Four weeks ago I was boarding a plane with people I did not know. I still remember that awkward feeling I had of traveling with people I did not know well. Meeting in the parking lot sooooooooooo early that morning. I still can't believe my trip to Haiti has come and gone. Almost like a weeklong dream. I remember waking up in Haiti (or even the nights when we went out to the school area to stargaze) thinking "IS THIS REAL LIFE"? I just do not know how a place so beautiful can see so much devastation and poverty. One time during the sunrise, Lacey pointed out that what we saw and heard (mountains, sunrise, and all the noises from the animals) were probably what the Garden was like.

I have had the opportunity to share with several people about Haiti. It helps to go through pictures with people. God is doing great things down there.

financial freedom

I am 27 years old and I AM DEBT FREE!

While talking to my roommate early last week about life and the readjustment to culture in America after returning from Haiti, I told her what I really wanted was to be debt free... then I said I could empty most of my savings account to do that right now...

And then I realized it was a reality.

My savings has not been this low since high school.

But I am completely DEBT FREE.

May 31, 2012 I made my final loan payment.

Yep. That is quite the payment and significantly larger than any amount I have ever paid.

Today I got the confirmation email that they received my payment. So I logged in just to make sure my balance really was $0.

YEA!!!

Special thanks to GOD for providing me with a variety of jobs these past five years.

Thanks to all the jobs who provided me the money to pay off this sucker.

Said jobs would include: KGBC, Walmart, Joann's, GFS, Sunset Shores, First Church of God, Storyline, WyldLife, Macomb Christian, substitute teaching and little odd jobs for people I am sure. (Yes, I realize that's a lot of jobs in the past five years, but each experience has helped me in some way figure out more about myself. I am thankful for each opportunity.)

Encouragement for people still in the battle with loans:

• Pay as much as you can. Thanks to Sarah V, my co-worker at Joann's, who was talking to a few of us one day about making payments on her car every time she got paid. Don't neglect needs but also don't be stupid with "extra" money that comes your way.
• Learn to say NO to yourself. My guilty pleasure is not clothes... it's books. Or travel. I look forward to taking a trip now that I can save up money for it. Dr. Rob Ford taught me in personal financial management class that saying no now (and having self-control) means saying YES later.
• Live within your means. I always laugh when my mom says that ministers do not make a lot of money. It CAN be true, but in my case, I was able to pay off my loan. I made ENOUGH money to live on and now I have even more freedom to choose jobs based on things other than money. I am blessed.
• BUDGET. Seriously. Do it and stick to it.

THANK YOU, DEAR JESUS.
IT IS FINISHED!

Haiti... meet Shalando and Mawoule

While I do not think I can ever truly put into words how much this trip to Haiti has meant to me, I am so thankful that I have pictures to remember moments throughout the trip.

Meet Shalando. I remember seeing him standing next to the fooseball table by himself. So, I asked him to play. Eventually, we sought each other out so that we could battle over fooseball. It was so awesome because during our first game (which turned into the best out of 5 games), he started singing Jesus Loves Me. So we sang worship songs while playing fooseball. He is 10 years old and simply awesome!

Meet Mawoule. She is simply precious. She is 12-years-old (have you noticed that even in Haiti I'm drawn to those who are in the middle school age group?!). The day before this picture was taken, our entire team went on a hike down to a waterfall. I am not much of a hiker and my asthma was acting up during that hike, so on Tuesday when they wanted to go to another waterfall, I chose to stay at the house. I wanted to read but ended up searching out water to take a shower. Mawoule saw that I wanted to wash my hair, filled a bucket with water, and proceeded to help me wash my hair. She was the perfect example of a servant, reminding me of John 13 when Jesus washed the disciples' feet. I am just sad that the next day I had to say goodbye. What a sweet heart she is.

 

While at House of Blessings Orphanage, we did work on the school. Sam (pictured with me below) was a great teammate. We learned rather quickly that we did well working together and basically did these two bathrooms while the rest of the team worked together on the other rooms. Our combination of perfectionism usually meant we wanted to measure the sheetrock right on the first try. I am glad I got to know him better.

I have more pictures and stories to share, but here are some reminders that I brought home with me.

The first is a bottle to add to my collection.

The bottle I kept was a fruit champagne bottle on the far right. Fruit Champagne is the Haitian cola. It's basically all sugar and I only drank half a bottle the entire time I was there. It was so super sweet! I also have two rocks from the orphanage.

It is so fitting that I found this banana bark artwork at the Baptist Mission the day our group went out to shop/barter with people. I shared several times with my team about my attitude with investing where I am at RIGHT NOW. Matthew 25 and the Parable of the Talents continues to convict me. This is the perfect piece of art for me.